


In Return (What Have I Done)

by SeverinadeStrango



Category: Sengoku Basara
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet, Blood, Descriptions of Pain, Hands Getting Sliced Open, M/M, Severina's March 2019 Requests, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-04-02
Packaged: 2019-12-30 18:36:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18320954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeverinadeStrango/pseuds/SeverinadeStrango
Summary: Masamune reflects on those he has hurt.  Kojuro remembers just how vulnerable his Lord truly is.





	In Return (What Have I Done)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Sam](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sam/gifts).



> This was written for Sam, my sister, as a request for the month of March 2019.

Masamune couldn’t bring himself to look up, even though he knew that he was nothing more than a coward for doing so. A coward, utterly inadequate, as he watched Kojuro wrap the stained bandages just a little tighter around the palm of his hand. Kojuro winced, and guilt stabbed at Masamune’s chest. 

He crossed his arms over his chest a little more tightly, as if somehow this would keep his resolve locked in for just a little longer when in reality all he wanted to do was to bring what was left of his army to a halt, and collapse on the ground and plead for forgiveness with a ferocity that nearly disgusted him had he not known that it was indeed warranted and perhaps even appropriate. What had he done – his closest friend, the man who he had grown up with since boyhood, who had been nothing but loyal even under duress of torture.

To think he would have struck him down in such a manner.

But seeing Kojuro’s stoic face, firmly schooled into an expression of neutrality, Masamune thought better of it. It was only when they finally stopped to water their horses at a nearby stream that Masamune looked down and saw the blood on the handle of his primary sword and felt a powerful wrench in his gut so strong he nearly staggered on his feet.

“Kojuro,” he started, and dutifully Kojuro turned on his heel, automatically straightening his back and preparing for whatever it was that his Lord might have required of him, and in that moment Masamune halted in his tracks, feeling the blood drain from his face. How could he have even thought to do such a thing. How could he how could he how _could_ he shirk the trust built up over so many years.

“Lord Masamune?” Kojuro’s brow furrowed slightly and he took a step forward, as if concerned, worried that he might have to catch his master, or pull him out of the way of some hurtling object. He’d done so with his injured hand. Already the blood was soaking through the bandages, no doubt having been reopened multiple times by the rough jolting of his reins. “Are you well?”

 _“Don’t_ ask me that!” Masamune barked with a ferocity that he _knew_ was both unwarranted and unkind, “You don’t need to worry about _me,_ I – “

“It is only out of concern,” Kojuro muttered, and squared his shoulders. That had backfired spectacularly – because Masamune had meant what he said, there was no need for Kojuro to worry about him especially when he was bleeding, when he was bleeding from a palm slash that Masamune himself had inflicted on him and when he had been unsure as to whether he would not go _further._ Yet the steely expression in his faithful friend’s eyes had only hardened, as if he had been struck and was recoiling in only the slightest of manners. Even after causing so much pain, Masamune had only managed, in his attempt to reconcile, to bring even more.

He exhaled sharply through his nose and ground his teeth in frustration, angry tears prickling the corners of his eyes but he would not let them fall. No, the last thing he needed was to look like an utter disgrace when it was not _his_ distress Kojuro should be focused on, not after – 

“Lord Masamune.”

Kojuro’s hand came down heavy and yet gentle on his shoulder, his thumb tracing small circles into his back, and Masamune froze. No no no don’t comfort me I don’t need it you do you do and he hated himself for being able to provide such, instead making his friend worry about him yet more. 

“There is nothing for me to forgive.” Kojuro meant every one of those words – Masamune couldn’t say _how_ he knew for sure, but there was an unbroken bond between them that had existed ever since they were both boys. He would never lie to him, never. 

“But – “

“Nothing.”

Kojuro turned him around.

“You are safe. I am alive. And I will continue to serve you until the day comes where I can no longer stand.” It might as well have been a command, had it not been for the sharp jerk to his front and then Masamune was enfolded in a fierce embrace that somehow brought the tears back and he fought against them once again, hands shaking as they clenched in the back of Kojuro’s jacket. 

Maybe not today, he resolved. But one day he would manage to prove himself worthy of Kojuro’s unfaltering loyalty, too pure and too wondrous to be deserved by any warrior.


End file.
